Spread a little happiness

Right, romantics, brace yourselves, I have something to say.

I don't do Valentine's Day.

Incywincystitches

I'm not the Cupid equivalent of bah humbug and it's not my way of saving face because my hubbie forgets every year. Valentine's Day just gets on my nerves.

I've done the get-no-cards-apart-from-one-from-my-sister thing (thanks, sis), I've done the smug I've-got-a-boyfriend-so-I'll-buy-the-greatest-love-album-of-all-time-on four-CDs thing, and now I'm happy to do the opt-out-of-the-second-most-commercial-event-of-the-year thing. (I'm rating Christmas at number one because December 25th is top dollar in my book! See, I'm not a bah humbug.)

I didn't decide one day that I was boycotting Valentine's Day, it was a gradual thing. Looking through restaurant windows (or worse being inside) and seeing every table was occupied by a couple just looked a bit, well, Stepford Wives. And then what about the mark-up on flowers, or anything red, in the month of February? Buy a bunch of red roses in September and it's one price, go to the flower stall in February and you need to take out a second mortgage. 

Lilfishstudios

Most of all, what irks me is the pressure that on one day of the year, if you're in a relationship you must be romantic and slushy and spend money to show you care. No effort necessary on the other 364 days of the year. And if you're not in a relationship, you're made to feel sidelined and, quite frankly, a bit crap.

Then there's possibly the worst group - those in a relationship whose partner doesn't live up to their loved one's expectations. I once worked in an office full of women where I watched them, one by one, become more disappointed (and then foul-tempered) because none of the bouquets of flowers being delivered to the building were for them. That was one unhappy little office.

Now, I usually keep my Valentine's Day opinion to myself because I appreciate most people don't share my view. And that's fine, I'm a live and let live kinda girl and if celebrating Valentine's makes you happy, by all means, paint the town rose red.

This year I thought I'd just voice it to see if there's anyone else out there that happens to feel the same way. After all, it's the little things in life that make most people smile: a stranger holding open a door or letting your car out, or your partner of many years making you a cup of tea without you having to ask. The husband of a work colleague left a surprise bag of her favourite jelly babies in her car because she was feeling poorly. On a really cold night my hubbie warms my side of the bed and then moves over to his chilly patch when I get in. When a friend of mine was proposed to by her boyfriend (a lovely enough event in itself) he brought along her mobile phone as he knew she'd want to call her mum straight away.

So, whatever you're up to next weekend, I hope you have a happy time doing it. And if you have a story that spread a little happiness in your, or someone else's, life, I'd love to hear it.

Lost-in-the-forest

Comments

[Clare Topping]

I agreee, my partner and I have never done Valentine's Day. Buying flowers once a year is not a show of love, it is the way you live your life and the support you give each other for the entire 365 days that really matters.

[Fairymix.blogspot.com]

Totally with you on all of this. We've never done Valentine's. It's the little things that matter in a relationship and not what you buy on one day a year, when marketing tells you to.
We're going out for dinner with friends on Saturday night, we completely forgot about the date (it's the 13th, but still). Hope the restaurant isn't full of "lovey-dovey" couples. ;-)

[Mrs Green @ my zero waste]

We don't do Valentine's Day either - it's commercial c***

EVERY day is an excuse to say I love you, right? And everyday we should take care of the people we love and spread happiness and love into the world.

Great post - have a happy Sunday :)

[SarahLP]

Very well said, i totally agree! I hate the pressure on men to buy flowers and take their ladies out for dinner on this one night when the price is ramped up and everyone is doing the same.

Having said that, those hand-made heart thingies you've found are all super cute!

Thanks so much for your lovely comment on my blog. :o)

[Louisa @ RecycleThis]

We don't do Valentine's for the same over-commercialised, would-prefer-to-be-loved-up-all-year-around reasons.

In the past, we've spent Valentine's night at Ikea, B&Q or doing a big supermarket shop - shops that are usually heaving with happy couples or families are always completely empty on 14th Feb. Make usually horrendous shopping trips slightly more enjoyable.

[Kirsty]

Hallelujah! I love you, and your wonderful commenters.

I've never done Valentine's either, for all of the reasons cited above and also the fact I had a part-time job in a card shop during my teens which, in all its Hallmarkish ghastliness, was enough to put anyone off for life. Nothing convinces you how hollow romance can be like watching half a townsworth of men dash in at 5.29pm on February 13th and grab the biggest card and gift they can, fuelled by a combination of panic and guilt.

I feel very lucky to have a man who, instead of buying me tacky Valentine's chocolates, came home a few weeks ago with a loaf of fancy bread to cheer me up (I am a hard bread-customer to please!) and does endless, regular, tiny-but-appreciated things to make me happy as can be.

Me? I get up at 5.30 every morning to iron him a shirt, make his packed lunch for work and wave him off from the end of the drive. Bearing in mind I work from home and could technically sleep for another three hours without missing a minute of the 9-5, I'd say that's love. :)

[Rosie]

Love is for life, not just for Valentine's day! Although it is a nice excuse for a meal out. :)

[the green gal]

I think that's what you call touching a nerve!
Thanks v much for your comments, it's heart-warming to hear your stories and at no extra cost with no need for a vase!
Enjoy your weekends and every day after that. x